Josh Howard Presents: Sasquatch

By Josh Howard

A collection of multi-story and artist created content on our sometimes friendly Bigfoot. The first story is cutesy and makes BF out to be a well-spoken vamp battling perv, since he'd been watching this girl choose her undies. Next is a Lil BF lonely and then discovering another BF in a cage at a circus. The keys are nearby, and lil BF helps BF out, but when the circus leader sees what's going on, BF chats with him away from everyone, then walks off, lil BF stuck, and regretting having met his own kind.

A weird 1 where BF is an actor on another planet and 1 of the p.a.'s has to piss him off since he'd lost his drive after living 2 million years. After this one is 1 where BF is the last of his kind and is taken out by a couple of hunters, despite the offering of knowledge. After comes a story where a couple guys drag a deer back to where they are working, the boss saying they'd brought something's food back, and to take it outside, then delegating tasks. Soon, the Native American guy kill the yeti, who turns up, killing the 2 idiots, and leaving he and the boss to clean up before more animals follow.

Another is a Gramps yeti retelling a story to a young’un, who urges him to get to the exciting bit when they're attacked and must defend Infinity city. Gramps kills some bug aliens, but this also is how he meets Grams, and the feud ends, their people joining forces. The next one is b&w about a sheriff going to the woods and meeting a verbal BF chilling in the area. Once the sheriff explains the reason he'd dropped by was due to a little girl's kidnapper going into BF's land, and wanted his help locating them, BF hunts them down, b.s.ing the sheriff at first by saying he was getting directions from the trees.

He was actually deducing the natural decision of the kidnapper if he knew where people hung out around the woods. BF fights the teacher kidnapper and breaks him, and at the end, the girl drawing a stanky bear having saved her. Smallfoot begins with an anthropologist/whatever on a radio show and he soon is defending himself from being called a hack, but the man demands his proof behind his talk. The fella has a mold of a foot, and notes reading he'd always search.

The story after is quite dramatic, involving 2 guys and a girl going on a road trip, but crash the car, 1 dude left for dead, whilst other fella carries chick through a graveyard, and knocks at a house with an unsympathetic older man, BF going off on the fella, and the girl now stuck with the old man. Then as a final twist, the guy left for dead saves her, and the 2 drive off. Next, Santa joins forces with Yeti to scare some bad boys. Yeti is simple though, so when the 1st kid happens to be pissing on a bush, Yeti drinks it, and scares the kid to run off.

Santa instigates Yeti to throw rocks at the 2 other boys, which leaves Yeti with a snowball cherry bomb to the face, so Santa suggests they stalk them back to their cabin. When Santa's next plan for the Yeti to go down the chimney fails, and ends with the Yeti getting fiery again, Santa insults him, and leaves Yeti in tears. After this one comes one with 2 hikers going up a mtn and dealing with the lack of oxygen when they discover a local man unconscious, but when the 2 start fighting for being at odds on whether helping him could endanger them, BF comes out and picks the man up. They follow BF to a village where they can get the monk help.

The 2 men agree BF was made up by their sickness, but 1 of them at least knew it was better they left BF a secret. Another story is of a boy quickly playing a sasquatch video game before going to see a movie. The boy tries a cheat code for a character and he's still defeated by sasquatch, but the action satisfies them. There's a sweet story of a boy befriending BF and taking him to show and tell at school, then the 2 killing it at kickball, and after school plan to do it again the next day, the boy and BF ending by confirming their being best buddies.

Another has a possible future where people wear yeti suits to weather the fall out of what's become of the world. Another story shows BF come to a young student scientist's rescue when her perv prof tries to sexually assault her, so Sasquatch swings his body into a tree, and smashes his face in the ground. At the end, the young lady learns the value to not write off the unknown only because no one can confirm the knowledge. Sasquatch joins the military, and has him go after an Arab; pure American.

Yeti also fights pilgrims attempting to locate a missing boy, but the exec. reading the story written by Sasquatch himself isn't impressed, since he's not very popular at the moment, the the Titanic, currently being where it's at. Sasquatch gets rejected by many, til 1 guy agrees, but only so he could get it rewritten so a shiny director agrees to take part. It gets made, and Sasquatch shows his displeasure at how they butchered his story at the premiere by butchering the people inside. Quite a serious one follows with the dark-toned story of twin boys thinking they see a reindeer outside and go to feed it, only to discover its dead, and sasquatch makes off with one of the boys, his twin forever guilty after.

A confusing b&w follows, but it's pretty funny learning Yeti is fighting a highly advanced enemy who creates celeb bots for him to fight, alongside who is shown to be human, but turns out to be another bot. We Bare Bears-style kid yetis chat on different topics regarding their understanding of humans. Throughout their varying discussions, it eventually leads them to bbqing a hunter. The final story is another weird perspective of a young lady and her fiance going camping where he shares his story of getting a Yeti's finger, and they make him pay, his ex-gf returning with the yeti. Entertainingly odd collection. I'm glad I got to read them.